I had one but it was paper thin,
worn from trial and battle,
scraped bare from neglect
and carelessness
when I found you.

My heart, paper thin,
very nearly
translucent in the sun,
the palest pink,
almost white.
barely beating out the faintest sound;
cotton balls thrown against her.

Your heart matched mine,
paper thin
but of tin
and not so easily seen through.

You took my paper heart,
told me it was fine,
held it
and crafted it into something folded
and scored,
adorned with creases
and secret pockets
until it was something new,
something to hold and cradle
and then you breathed into it
and stories
and ideas.

You handed it back,
told me to use my own breath
and to fill it.
I did
and it ballooned into a paper heart,
magical and three dimensional,
scored and folded into my heart.
Something  bigger,
full of good things,
and room to store more.

Then I saw a faint flicker cross your heart,
a sadness that went deep
and wide like the ocean…
but it was gone in less than a flash.
I wondered what I saw,
how someone so wonderful could have longing,
feel empty,
or seem sad at all…
in the quiet I heard the beat of your heart,
the strength of the thump,
felt the music,
then how the hollow sound of metal tapping out a beat.

Metal against metal
and I remembered your tin heart
that cannot be turned and crafted so easily as mine,
that the sun cannot shine through
and breath alone cannot transform
and I swallowed my self pity
and hid my tear
and was thankful to be a little fragile.

One thought on “Paper

  1. Reblogged this on Matilda the Moonraker and commented:

    Of course my thoughts and feelings seem ever changing and what I loved about today I may not feel any attachment to tomorrow (metaphorically) but this is still one of my favorite writings…I don’t know if that is what you call it, is it a poem or prose. Heck, I just like it.
    When I was writing it I was looking back on a relationship, sure that it had been horrible only to see how lucky I was for the encounter, how much broader it made the way I considered what I wanted in my life and from living.


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